Hope in You

"You are strong Olivia. You can do this." Those are the words that I literally would say out loud to myself every day. I don't really know why I would say them. I didn't feel strong and I didn't think I could do it. I was in beauty school at the time and it is ironic because I felt like I was the opposite of "beauty". I counted down the days until I would be done and could
rebuild myself, so to say. I remember my last day and the amazing feeling I had when I was done. I had tears running down my face as I left and I knew I would never go back.

"Come on Olivia you can do this." I found myself saying this again. This time it was different. I felt weak but I knew I was strong but I just was scared and having a weak moment. This time I was in scrubs waiting to go get an MRI for my back. As they took me back may things were going through my head-- I want my mom. What are the results going to be? I want the results now. 

Once again. "Olivia you are strong." This time I was weak. I was pretty much at my whits end. Questions and thoughts ran through my head. "Why me?" "You are 21 with fibromyalgia." "You will never feel better."

A thought came to me this week. I am strong. I am 21, and a heck of 21 year old!  And I can do this.

Life is tough. At times you may feel weak and like you can't do it. But guess what?  You did it and are doing it. You, yes you, have overcome so much. No matter how hard the journey has been. No matter the bad thoughts,  no matter the frightened moments, there is something that has endured it all. And that is you. You have decided that whatever choices you have made or bad mistakes you have chosen,  you aren't going to let it rule your life.

To anyone reading this, you are amazing. Tell yourself out loud daily. You are strong. And no matter what --there is always hope. Hope for the future, hope for now, and hope in you.